Betcha didn’t see that one coming.
It’s the second time, since the 2000 Bush-Gore election, that the Democratic party has won the election, but doesn’t get to sit in the Oval Office. Not so much of a clear statement, I’m afraid, but I shall make things straight right away. For a nation that claims to be led by “the leader of the free world”, the United States have an electoral system for which the word “democratic” is not the first one that comes to mind. Basically, in the US, when you vote, you are actually choosing the electors of your state, which will then gather in the electoral college and elect the president. Looks pretty much straight forward and also fairly democratic now doesn’t it? The problem is that the number of electors assigned to each state actually gives more power to those who live in smaller states, so that, for example, you would need three times as many Californians to make one vote from Wyoming (1 electoral vote every 411 thousand voters against 1 every 135 thousand voters). In this process, swing states are created, which are a handful of states that actually count way more than others, and virtually decide the result of the elections. Basically, the value of you vote depends on where you leave. Neat! But that’s not all there is to it. With the current system, where the electoral votes are not given proportionally, if you vote for the party that loses in your state, your vote counts virtually zero, and you might as well have stayed home, curled up in the corner of your closet hoping for the electoral nightmare to be over. Statistics show that with this system up to 80% of the popular votes doesn’t weigh in on the matter of choosing the next president. A clear demonstration comes from the 2012 elections, where, if the electoral votes had been assigned proportionally, 16 voted from Texas would have gone to Obama, and 20 of California’s to Romney. To top it all of, there’s the electoral college, a bunch of retired politicians and lobbyists (not always clearly distinguishable), which cast their vote for the next President. The really crazy thing is that in 24 states the electors don’t even have to vote for what the people choose! In conclusion, what the people really want does not really count. It’s just another statistics, as are the 47,78% of Americans that voted Clinton (against the 47,33% of Trump’s supporters), that are still rallying the streets against what they rightfully claim not being their President. After this election, people are indeed so happy of the results that many of them are seriously thinking about moving to more progressive countries, like Canada, whose immigration website crashed, on Election Night, under the pressure of an estimated 200 thousand users, half of which were from the US, or North Korea, whose leader seems to share the view of President-Elect Toupee on, well, let’s go with quirky, hairstyles.
America must feel really good being made great again.
Now, predictably we cannot all have the same cool as Hillary Clinton, whom, with nerves of steel that show the Margaret Thatcher that’s in her, declared that Trump deserves an open mind and the chance to govern. To that, the rational me says, albeit quite reluctantly, yes, while the other part of me also has his share of things to say. None of which, I suspect, I’d be allowed to report here. Maybe we just have to give ourselves some time, to try and take this all in. In our defense, no-one saw that coming, especially the pollsters, who shanked this one right into the woods. Even the magic goat from Scotland picked Hillary over Trump!
We will now, in the face of evidence, have to admit it. Trump was right, when he said the elections were rigged. The only thing he forgot to mention? They were rigged in his favor. The new voting requirements that were introduced at state level, like requests for photo ID, together with a reduced number of voting centers, are indeed more likely to affect those, namely minorities and people with lower incomes, that have higher probability to be voting Democrats, unlike the average Trump voter whom, regardless of the blatant lies told by the Don during his campaign, has an average yearly income of 72 thousand dollars. Not exactly the first number that comes to mind when you hear about “working class support”. The only poor thing Trump voters have is judgment. We don’t have to forget, though, that some of the tycoon’s supporters were unusually powerful. How often is a candidate endorsed by both the KGB and the FBI? Oh, and don’t forget about the KKK! Although, now that you think of it, when a leader takes power thanks to factions in the security services and the military, and with the support of the iron-fisted ruler of a foreign nation, it is usually called a coup d’état. And the Americans call it an election. Well, to each his own, I guess.
All jokes aside, though, we have to give it to Trump. He kept his promise. When he said “I keep whining and whining until I win”, he really did mean it. He whined. Boy he whined. And, indeed, he won. Trump’s campaign surely made whining great again. While we’re at it, we might as well take a look at President-Elect Thin-Skinned’s campaign, and begin by saying that it went bankrupt with a 45.7 million Dollars deficit, which kind of makes you wonder how a man who went bankrupt four times in his career as an entrepreneur (yes, he lied about that too), and can’t even keep his electoral campaign on its feet, could possibly do any good to a whole country’s economy. Sadly, though, Trump’s uber-businessman aura is not even close to being the only lie he shamelessly told as he ran for Office. Without the press covering it thoroughly (or even fairly, for that matter), Trump was free to build his campaign solely on lies and speeches that were so unhinged and un-fact-checked that it seriously makes you question the sanity of the American people. A good deal of it has to blamed on the press, which didn’t even bother to remember the general public that, contrary to what Trump “heard” (because he doesn’t inform himself, he is beyond that, he hears), the USA are in a very good place as a nation right now. Violent crime (excluding the ones perpetrated by the police, maybe) is at its lowest since 1970, the military, Americans’ favorite turn on, is better funded than ever, Obama care didn’t destroy the insurance business, as more Americans are insured than ever, fewer smoke, cancer, teen pregnancy and alcohol abuse are down, the stock market went from under 17 thousand points to over 18, 14 million jobs have been added, the economy is better that the one promised by Romney in 2012, as unemployment is below 5% (yes, even though Trump was hearing that it was around 30-32%), and consumer sentiment is as high as it was in the ‘80s under Saint Reagan. All things the new administration will quite happily, and quite possibly, take credit for. So, while he kept blithering about how blacks have so many advantages over whites (his nonexistent working class supporters especially), like free law enforcement issued bullets, and in all likelihood from now on, a daily stop and frisk, Americans were happily eating it all up. So much so that nobody argued when the Republican Party dubbed this elections “Flight 93 elections”, basically comparing an eventual Democratic victory with a terrorist attack (flight 93 was one of the planes that were hijacked on 9/11, but was then diverted by the passengers and crashed in a field in Pennsylvania, so this metaphor doesn’t actually make either party look that good). Despite all of this, his supporters liked him, and he had many of them. Some of them even praised him (and still do) as their champion, and rallied the streets dressed in white gowns and hoods! Forget about “let’s make America great again!”, Trump’s campaign slogan should have been “Yes we Klan!”.
Now, Trump is a smart man, or at least claims to be (chances are he hears that too), but nevertheless he made some pretty wild claims during his campaign, such as “vaccines cause autism”, wind farms are “disgusting looking” and “bad for people’s health”, and “I know words, I know the best words”. The now President-Elect (still doesn’t seem real) has also stated that if he were to become President, he would have surrounded himself with the best and the brightest, so that’s good, right? Yes, until you look at who they are, starting with Omarosa Manigault, ex Apprentice contestant and Trump’s adviser on Afro-American outreach (which clearly is all the outreach he did, assuming he didn’t fall into more or less old habits). If Trumpism became a religion, she would probably be the head of it. Interviewed after Trump’s victory Mrs. Manigault stated that His victory was the “ultimate revenge” against Trump’s detractors, which did not show at all the deranged, vindictive, thin-skinned egomaniac dictator that lives under Trump’s shiny wig and has kept himself so well hidden during the campaign. The head of Trump’s church then added at her list of unsettling statements that “it’s so great that are enemies are making themselves clear, Mr. Trump has a long memory, and we’re keeping a list”. Well, that just went Nixon faster than you can say Watergate! But this rocket scientist is just the tip of the iceberg. How about Mike Pence, Vice-President Elect, christian conservative, climate change denier and Tea Party quack? In 2000 he made the ludicrously stupid claim that “smoking doesn’t kill you” (neither does running head first into a moving truck, try it). This genius is a haughty opposer of abortion and anti LGBT discrimination laws, and an advocate of LGBT conversion programs. Pence is also the one that introduced in Indiana, during his mandate as governor, the highly discussed Religious Freedom Restoration Act, which makes religious belief admissible as a defense in court. Basically, you can get shot because you are an infidel. How fun! And how progressive of him!
Next in Trump’s swamp of geniuses, we have former neurosurgeon and young earth creationist Doctor Ben Carson, who believes that Joseph (son of Abraham) built the pyramids to store grain and is on the shortlist for Secretary of Education. As other of Trump’s inner circle, he also denies climate change and is anti abortion. Carson is so outspokenly anti abortion that he compared women who have abortions to slave owners, which he was apparently allowed to say because he is black. And a crazy person. But than he also believes that gun control would make the situation in the USA akin to that of Nazi Germany, so maybe we have still to see the worse of him. With Carson in control, the future of America’s education looks particularly bright, especially as he thinks that creationism should be taught as a viable alternative to evolution. Oh, did I mention that he spoke keenly against free college education? Looks like the new policy will be the dumber the better.
Now it’s the turn of white supremacist Stephen Bannon, as Chief Strategist and Senior Counselor of the Trump administration. He is a fun one. CEO of Trump’s campaign from august, until then he kept himself busy, as he presided alt-right websites, was accused of domestic abuse, made openly anti Semitic remarks and directed Breitbart News, which is, surprise surprise, conservative and alt-right. Bannon’s appointment is also proof that Trump has already begun to let down his supporters, as the “Daily Stormer”, a main neo nazi news site, said that they praise the choice, as does former KKK Grand Wizard David Duke, but they would have preferred him as Chief of Staff instead of Reince Priebus.
Ladies and gentlemen, prepare to bash repeatedly your head against the wall in despair, as I now bring you the next entry on our list. He is a climate change denier (for a change), and head of the Centre for Energy and Environment at CEI, Competitive Enterprise Institute, an organization mainly funded by Koch Industries, a multinational born as an oil refinery, and Murray Energy Corporation, aka the largest privately owned coal mine in the USA. Now I know it doesn’t sound like it, but trust me, they’re lobbying. Big time. Our mystery man is also the brilliant mind who gave birth to a CEI commercial in which CO2 is defined with these words: “what we breathe out and plants breathe in. They call it pollution. We call it life”. He is the one and only Myron Ebell, and he’ll lead the Trump’s administration EPA transition team. I know that the term “transition” doesn’t sound so bad, but Trump’s idea of transition is “get rid of EPA in almost every form” and “cut its regulations by 70 or 80%”, based on the fact that it is too much of a burden on the new administration’s budget. Even though, at only 8 billion Dollars, it amounts to roughly 1% of USA’s deficit. Priorities, I guess?
I must say, I’m beginning to feel slightly uneasy, about Trump’s choice of Cabinet, and the fact that he might be considering Donald Jr. for a position (naming your son for a Cabinet appointment? Again, Mr. Trump, way to go on the non-dictator thing), does not make me feel much better either. President tiny-hands’ “best and brightest” look very much like a plethora of woeful cretins with staggeringly idiotic ideas.
But Trump’s poor judgment doesn’t stop there, and to prove it to you, here are a few names on the shortlists for various offices, starting with warmonger John Bolton for Secretary of State. To follow, how about anti-muslim alt-right conspiracy theorist Clare Lopez, for no less than Deputy National Security Adviser. Having saved the best for last, let us now move on to the shortlist for Interior Secretary, where we find CEO of Continental Resources and oil and gas magnate Harold Hamm (also on the shortlist for Secretary of Energy), Lucas Oil exec Forrest Lucas and, my personal favorite, former Governor of Alaska and gun-nut Sarah Palin! What a wild bunch!
I know that these inconsiderate (to put it mildly) nominations make you lose faith in the future of humanity, but not all his lost, as in his campaign Trump claimed that he knows “people you never heard of that are better than the ones you did hear of”. Well, let’s hope so, since the ones we did hear of are a heap of junk.
As bad as Trump’s Cabinet is, between buffoons of the likes of Mike “smoking doesn’t kill you” Pence, Ben “s**t I made up about Egypt” Carson and Sarah “drill baby drill!” Palin, it sadly is not the biggest problem about the new administration. During the coming term, America will likely change a great deal, and a preview of this change is clearly visible in the differences between the outgoing President and the incoming one. In one night, America went from a black president to one who’s on the Klan’s wish list. The USA also went from a President that took climate change a deadly serious issue, to one who “believes there’s weather”. And this will be the main focus of the next point, because the man who brought us pearls of wisdom such as “wind farms are bad for people’s health” and “Obama is the founder of ISIS”, also stated that climate change is Chinese hoax aimed at crippling US manufacturing. A quick word to the Trump voters: he must really think you are dumber than a bag of rocks, and it looks like he might be right, because while he was ranting and raving about how climate change was a hoax and how he wanted to build a wall along the Mexican border, he listed climate change as the main cause in the application for a permit to build coastal protection walls (the only ones he has an interest in building) to prevent the golf courses of his seaside resort in Ireland from being eaten away by the rising sea levels. He baited you, and you swallowed it whole. So what will the environmental policies of a man who claims the existence of “clean coal”, be? At the first place on the list we find abolishing Obama’s Clean Power Plan, therefore reopening areas previously closed for coal and oil development, and rescinding regulations that controlled the extraction of fossil fuels, while in the meantime bring to a complete halt the development programs for clean energy sources, which is as appalling as it was predictable, given his backers and his Cabinet choices. Desperate? You should be, but not too much, because the best has still to come. In a best case scenario, Trump plans to renegotiate the Paris agreement, while in a worst case scenario he wants to scrap it completely, which is an eventuality that would render the objective of keeping global warming under 2° Celsius virtually impossible. Luke Kemp, lecturer in International Realtions and Environmental Policy at the Australian National University, deems an eventual rescission by the US as the Paris Agreement’s “death knoll”. Luckily, the agreement won’t go peacefully, as a rescission (which can be done by Trump without congressional approval, not that it would be a problem given the current situation) would take 4 years, which would though become only 1 if he were to decide to pull out of the overall Climate Convention. Other nations which are part of the agreement are already considering countermeasures such as those suggested by some European leaders, which would consist, if enforced, in a “carbon tax” on imported American goods. This and other nonsense are listed in Trump’s very own website greatagain.gov, which gives a list of steps to make America great again by setting the planet on the course for destruction. Apparently he hasn’t considered the slight problem that America is pretty sturdily anchored to the planet Earth. Albeit irresponsible, those steps are not actual crazy talk, as they are some of a series of steps Trump could take to further boost USA’s economy, as long as he were willing to ignore altogether long term consequences, that would show themselves only when Trump’s mandate would be long gone. Among those steps are scrapping free trade agreements such as NAFTA and TPP, which would likely cripple future collaboration attempts, pouring cash into big banks, and run up trillions of Dollars in debt by cutting taxes without cutting government funded programs. Except for scientific research, which he does not seem inclined to fund further, as he failed to identify even one field that he though being worth funding any further. Trump could also, and in all likelihood will, unshackle extraction corporations, trading profit for health, as estimates show that a two-term Trump presidency would release a further 3.4 billion tons of CO2. Again, he is a smart man. At least, though, the news of his victory was well received at the Marrakesh UN Climate Talk, with other “best words” such as “shocking” and “scary”. A New Jersey native and student observer in Marrakesh, interviewed by USA Today, said that “Before, we were told our job would be to use the next months to try to push the Hillary Clinton administration to do more when it came to climate change. After the election, we were told we would have to try to push the Trump administration to do something. Anything”. Reassuring, right?
Among other reassuring things that were said in the days immediately following the election, shines is Trump himself with a fantastic “don’t be afraid”, which probably marks the first time a newly elected President had to say something like this, and would also stand as a primacy in an eventual list of unsettling statements. There is also Reince Priebus, the orange-man’s Chief of Staff, who said to the press that President-Elect Trump “is taking this very seriously”. Well, I would most definitely hope so! Not even Obama was able to keep his proverbial cool, not completely, as he emphasized the need for calm (again, reassuring) right before leaving for Greece. But he’ll be back. Maybe. Now, Trump and Obama met some days ago, so that the incoming President could be shown around the White House and confront with the outgoing President on some of the most urgent issues, as well as receive maybe some advice about the duties he prepares to burden himself (more or less, in this particular case) with. And, let’s face it, Trump really needs advice. And a lot of it too. He is a true outsider, as he claimed time and time again, in the purest sense of the term possible. Trump held no other office, and did not serve in any branch of the military or the government. In fact, President of the United States is the first job he actually had to apply for. Trump is so clueless that Obama has already stated (possibly the first reassuring statement anyone has made since election night) that he would spend more time with Trump than is usual for a former President to spend with his successor, in order to walk him (hand in hand, as you would do with a preschooler) through every step of the transition, and possibly make sure that Trump does not screw anything up during his first days in office. The two presidents were not the only one to meet in the White House that day, as the First Ladies met as well. My personal guess would be that Melania needed some clarification over a few passages of Michelle’s speeches that she did not quite understand. The Obama-Trump meeting must have been a very fun one, given their past exchanges of pleasantries during the campaigning period. “So, Donald, at the end of this hallway there is the Oval Office. You know, the one I’ve declared you uniquely unqualified and fundamentally unfit to sit in.” “Oh, you mean the one I said you should not have been sitting in as you are not born in the USA and are the founder of ISIS, as well as a member of the Muslim Brotherhood?” “Precisely. You catch on quick”. One of the pictures that was taken shows the slightly tense atmosphere that likely permeated the whole meeting, and it is the one of the handshake between the two presidents, in which non of the two smiles (they actually both look away). It must have been one of the coldest handshakes in history. Just looking at the picture makes you want to put on a jacket. As telltale as the handshake picture can be, there is another one that I think is even more revealing. It really is the face of a nation. It is the picture taken of the White House staff as Trump and Obama meet. The look on their faces gives a new face to the expression “if eyes could kill”. They are looking at him with the same looks a Trump voter would save for the Muslim son of a Chinese and a Mexican immigrant who voted for Clinton. Another attempt to reassure the general public, which crashed and burned miserably with all the others, was made by the Withe House Press Secretary Josh Earnest, who clearly did not live up to his name when he said that: “President Obama came away from the meeting with (five second pause in which he smiled, and I would have bet my life he was going to say something like dread, or despair) renewed confidence”. I must say, it really didn’t help. I still don’t feel very good about this whole thing.
At the end of the day, though, as much as Trump is a quaint character with his very own brand of crazy, whether he is aware of it or not, he is just a puppet. He doesn’t have the experience, and quite possibly not even the intellect needed to be a strong leader by himself. He is good with rallies, because he is a racist, and racism sells itself, and he is a bigot (even though he breaks one of the ten commandments with every breath), which makes him the perfect candidate for a nation who would not vote for someone just because he is not religious (or for another religion, for that matter), and happily align itself behind the banner of faith, regardless of how fake it could be. Proof of this are the herd of religious conservatives such as the Evangelicals (although the Mormons bailed on him, big time) who stormed behind Trump even though he practically is the Devil. The ones who pull the strings range from foreign leaders (let’s not make names, Putin) to lobbyists who see in him the chance of having a puppet government easy to manipulate in their own interest. Not that surprisingly, a good deal of Americans seem to be completely blind when it comes to this, as seemingly not many eyebrows were raised as the CIA said clearly that Russia hacked the Democrats, and Michael Rogers, head of NSA, said that the Clinton campaign was targeted by a foreign power, and the target was not a choice driven by a whim, but was a well targeted attempt to achieve a certain result. They clearly succeeded, and America calmly sat back while another nation shaped their elections, and their new leader enjoyed his time bowing down to the leader of said nation, so that Uncle Sam became Uncle Vladimir. Face it America. You did not make the smart decision. You want to be made great again? Elect someone who knows how to do it.
When interviewed, Trump had already, luckily, started delegating his job to others, as his said that he want his V.P. to be responsible for domestic and foreign policies. Which makes you wonder what exactly does he plan to do in the next four years. Maybe he’ll just make America great again.
And if it doesn’t work, he’ll probably grab her by the pussy.
Davide Costa